COM 361 CMU Communications Advice Problems & Response Paper

COM 361 Problem/Advice Assignment
Instructions: Choose ONE of the following four problems. You will write a response letter to
the individual using information you have read and talked about in class. Refer to the
Assignment Sheet for Advice Problems & Responses in Blackboard for full instructions.
Problem #1
Dear COM 361,
My boyfriend and I have been dating for about 8 months. Recently it became a long distance
relationship due to the fact that I moved to a college four hours away. We are normally pretty
good at communicating and talking about our feelings, even when something is bothering us.
However, since the shift from being 20 minutes away to 4 hours, we have been arguing about
more and more.
When we start to argue, I always try to communicate through the problem. However, my
boyfriend tends to use avoidance to get away from the issue, and nothing ever gets solved. I have
always been big on communication. I prefer talking about things that bother either him or I and
listening to each other’s feelings. It’s important for me to make sure he knows I care how he
feels.
Recently, I have been feeling that all my feelings are being disregarded to my boyfriend. We
have totally different views on how to resolve an issue. He doesn’t seem to understand how this
is hurting me. I’m not sure what to do. I have tried to talk to him about it several times, but the
same thing always happens. He gets mad when I bring something up, and then just ignores the
issue and moves on. I don’t think he wants see it from my point of view. How do I make him
understand what I’m feeling and how to I make him care?
Sincerely,
Long Distance & Lost
Chat GPT’s response to Long Distance & Lost
Maintaining a healthy relationship, especially in a long-distance context, requires
understanding, effort, and effective communication from both parties. It’s evident that you value
communication and emotional intimacy. Here are some strategies to potentially help bridge the
communication gap:
1. **Choose the Right Moment**: Start conversations when you’re both calm and free of
distractions. Trying to discuss emotional topics during times of stress or when one of you is
preoccupied can exacerbate misunderstandings.
2. **Use “I” Statements**: Frame your concerns using “I feel” rather than “you make me feel.”
This prevents your partner from feeling attacked and can help them be more receptive. For
instance, “I feel hurt when our concerns aren’t addressed” is less confrontational than “You
always ignore our problems.”
3. **Seek Understanding First**: Before sharing your perspective, try to understand his point of
view. Ask open-ended questions like, “Can you help me understand why you prefer not to talk
about this right now?” This approach can make him feel validated, and he might be more
inclined to listen to your feelings afterwards.
4. **Suggest a Mediated Conversation**: Consider involving a neutral third party, like a
relationship counselor, who can facilitate and provide tools for more productive conversations.
5. **Write a Letter**: Sometimes writing can be a more effective way to communicate feelings.
It allows for reflection and prevents interruptions. Express your feelings and concerns in a letter
and ask him to read it at his leisure.
6. **Empathize with His Avoidance**: Understanding why he avoids confrontation can be key.
Maybe he feels overwhelmed, fears conflict, or thinks he’s protecting the relationship by
avoiding arguments. If you can understand the root of his avoidance, you might be able to
address it more effectively.
7. **Set Clear Boundaries**: If a particular issue needs addressing, set clear boundaries.
Express that it’s important for you both to discuss it and come to a resolution.
8. **Be Honest About Your Needs**: Clearly articulate your emotional needs in the relationship
and why they matter. If open communication is crucial for you, he needs to understand this.
Conversely, try to understand his needs too.
9. **Consider Couples Therapy**: Even if you’re in a long-distance relationship, there are
therapists who offer online sessions. They can provide guidance and strategies to help you both
communicate more effectively.
10. **Re-evaluate the Relationship**: If, after trying numerous strategies, there’s no change in
his behavior or willingness to communicate, it may be time to reflect on whether this relationship
meets your emotional needs.
Lastly, it’s essential to remember that you cannot force someone to understand or care. Both
individuals in a relationship must be willing to make efforts to sustain and nurture it. However,
by implementing some of the above strategies, you might find more effective ways to
communicate and empathize with each other.
Problem #2
Dear COM 361,
My brother does not have the same communication style as I do. Whenever we have a
conversation, I feel as if he is just going through the motions, waiting for his turn to share.
Often, I find myself trying to give leading statements that I feel someone who is actively
listening should have at least a follow up on. I understand everyone has their own priorities;
however, I get frustrated that his priorities don’t seem to include having a real conversation with
me. It really bothers me that my brother doesn’t seem interested in anything that matters to me.
In a recent conversation, I listened as he talked about something that mattered to him. I even
engaged by asking questions and making comments to show I was interested. When it seemed
like he was finished, I moved the conversation along to the topic I wanted. I said something
along the lines of “The next time I go to upgrade [the specific computer] it’s going to be
ludicrously expensive.” He simply moved on to the next topic that he wanted, as though I had
said nothing. What should I do? I love my brother and want both of us to be able to talk about
what matters to us. I’m afraid if things stay this way, I will just stop talking to him.
Signed,
Baffled Brother
Chat GPT’s response to Baffled Brother
It’s challenging when you feel that someone you care about isn’t reciprocating the same level of
attention and interest in your life as you do in theirs. The fact that you’re committed to
addressing this issue and preserving your relationship with your brother speaks volumes about
your love for him. Here are some strategies to consider:
1. **Direct Conversation**: The most straightforward approach might be to share your feelings
with him directly. Tell him you value your relationship and would love for both of you to connect
more genuinely. Use “I” statements to express your feelings without seeming confrontational,
such as “I feel overlooked when we talk” or “I would appreciate it if you showed more interest in
what I have to say.”
2. **Ask Open-ended Questions**: Instead of making statements, consider asking him openended questions about topics you’re interested in. This approach can naturally pull him into the
conversation.
3. **Seek Feedback**: Maybe there are things you’re unaware of. You could ask him if there’s a
reason he feels more disconnected during certain parts of the conversation.
4. **Plan Focused Times to Talk**: Set aside designated times for meaningful conversations. If
you know you’ll both be uninterrupted and can give each other your full attention, it might lead
to a more fruitful exchange.
5. **Find Common Interests**: If you can identify shared hobbies or interests, it can serve as a
bridge for more meaningful conversations. This shared territory might make him more attentive.
6. **Express Your Need for Reciprocity**: You can directly communicate your need for
reciprocity in your conversations. You might say something like, “I value our relationship, and I
enjoy hearing about your life. I’d love it if you could also show interest in mine.”
7. **Model the Behavior**: Continue doing what you’re doing by showing genuine interest in
his life. Sometimes, setting a consistent example can influence another person’s behavior, even if
it takes time.
8. **Consider External Factors**: Is it possible that there are external factors affecting his
behavior? Stress, distractions, or personal issues might make him seem distant or inattentive.
9. **Accept Differences**: Understand that everyone has their own communication style. If he
doesn’t change his behavior, it might be worth considering if you can find a level of acceptance.
Relationships are a two-way street, but sometimes they require adjustments to how we perceive
or understand the other person.
10. **Seek Counseling or Mediation**: If your attempts don’t yield results, you might consider
family counseling. A neutral third party can provide insight and offer strategies to improve
communication.
It’s important to maintain patience and empathy. Remember that healthy relationships are built
on mutual respect and understanding. If you approach the situation with love and a genuine
desire for connection, you’re already on the right track.
Problem #3
Dear COM 361,
I work at a restaurant that is popular in town so it’s always so busy. Working in a restaurant job,
everyone that is on shift is assigned a duty for the duration of the shift. One day last week while I
was at work, we were super busy and were on a wait. Myself and three other people had the duty
of refilling the ice throughout the shift.
As the time went on throughout I noticed ice was getting low and began to fill it. (For context
there are 2 drink stations in the restaurant and the refill station is towards the back of the
restaurant). I filled one station before I had to go check on my tables and food orders. As I was
about to leave the kitchen I overheard a coworker, who was also on ice duty, say ice for the
second station needed to be filled.
Since she was also on ice duty, I thought nothing of it and went to my table. After maybe 15-20
minutes, I walked into the kitchen where now both ice stations were nearly completely empty. I
went up to the co-worker saying “I thought you were going to get ice. I heard you say ice was
low when you noticed it.” She replied, “No.” I said “You’re just going to walk away and not fill
it even though both ice stations are nearly out?” She chuckled and said, “Yep.”
The amount of frustration that entered my body at that moment was huge. I understand we all are
busy but if there are four people on ice it shouldn’t be empty if we all take turns and help one
another out if the other people are busy. The fact that she didn’t care on such a busy day and not
helping out was a problem for me. How should I go about addressing this issue in the future so
each team member is helping out on such busy days?
Signed,
Stressed Server
Chat GPT’s response to Stressed Server
Working in a fast-paced environment, especially a popular restaurant, can be challenging.
Collaborative teamwork is crucial for smooth operations. Here’s how you can address the
situation and foster a more cooperative team dynamic:
1. **Stay Calm**: It’s natural to feel frustrated when a coworker isn’t pulling their weight,
especially during peak times. However, reacting out of anger can escalate the situation. Take a
deep breath, maintain your composure, and approach the situation with a problem-solving
mindset.
2. **Direct Communication**: Talk to your coworker privately. Express your concerns using “I”
statements to avoid sounding confrontational. For instance, say, “I noticed the ice wasn’t being
refilled during our last shift. It’s tough for me to keep up when it feels like I’m doing it alone. Can
we work together to make sure it’s refilled?”
3. **Seek Management’s Input**: If direct communication doesn’t help, consider discussing the
situation with a manager or supervisor. They might offer solutions, assign clear duties, or
mediate a conversation between you and your coworker.
4. **Suggest a System**: Propose a system or schedule for ice refills, especially during busy
hours. For instance, you can suggest that each person refills the ice once per hour, or after they
complete specific tasks. This way, the responsibility is evenly distributed.
5. **Be Proactive**: If you notice the ice running low, communicate this to the team. Say
something like, “I just refilled the front ice station; can someone take care of the back station
next?”
6. **Promote Team Spirit**: Fostering a positive team environment can lead to better
collaboration. Consider suggesting team-building activities or huddles before shifts to set the
tone and communicate shared goals.
7. **Offer Help**: Sometimes, the best way to model desired behavior is to help out. If you see a
coworker swamped with tasks, offer assistance. This gesture of goodwill can set a precedent for
future cooperation.
8. **Share Feedback**: Offer constructive feedback during team meetings. Sharing how the lack
of ice impacts the workflow and the experience for customers might help some team members
realize the importance of their duties.
9. **Training**: If this is a recurrent issue, it might be beneficial to conduct a refresher training
session for all employees on their duties. This can ensure that everyone is on the same page
regarding their responsibilities.
10. **Be Empathetic**: Everyone has off days. If this was a one-time occurrence, consider the
possibility that there might be external factors affecting your coworker’s performance that day.
Fostering a team environment where everyone feels responsible and takes ownership of their
duties is essential. Encourage open communication, and remember to approach the situation
with a collaborative mindset rather than an accusatory one.
Problem #4
Dear Com 361,
I have an interpersonal problem. This is about a group text with my friends. One of the people in
my friend group is a lot different in person than on text. I am struggling to figure out how to fix
this because it has created a big problem in my friend group. Some people are not being friends
anymore because of it. But all of this conflict seems to occur over stupid things.
This individual is always attacking people and being very disrespectful. He is somewhat new to
our friend group. One of the questions we have is how do we approach it? We want to address
the issue over text first. We can go from there to an in person conversation once we get to that
step. The problem I need help with is how to approach this situation with him and the friend
group. Like I said he attacks people over text but in person he is very nice and acts like nothing
happened and says he didn’t mean it in a mean way or in a way to hurt them. But we know he
just won’t say anything in person and only in text. I need help with trying to fix this and figure
out how to change this and make it better. I don’t want our friend group to completely fall apart
over this. Help!
Sincerely,
Frustrated Friend
Chat GPT’s Response to Frustrated Friend
It’s indeed challenging to handle conflicts arising from digital communications. The impersonal
nature of text messaging can easily lead to misinterpretations. Here’s a step-by-step approach to
address the situation:
1. **Choose the Right Messenger**: If there’s someone in the group who is closer to this
individual or who is known to be a neutral party, consider having them initiate the conversation.
2. **Initiate a Private Chat**: Instead of addressing the issue in the group chat initially,
consider texting the individual privately first. The aim is to not make them defensive, and a
private conversation might be less intimidating.
3. **Use “I” Statements and Be Non-confrontational**: Instead of saying “You always attack
people in texts,” you can say, “I’ve noticed that sometimes the group chat can get intense, and I
feel that misunderstandings are arising. How do you feel about it?”
4. **Express Concern and Seek Clarification**: The tone of the message should convey concern
rather than blame. You could say, “We value your friendship and want to ensure we’re all on the
same page. Can we discuss the group chat dynamics?”
5. **Suggest an In-Person Meeting**: After initiating the conversation over text, express a
desire to discuss it further in person. “It might be easier to understand each other if we talk faceto-face. Would you be open to that?”
6. **Group Meeting**: If you feel the need to discuss it as a group after your one-on-one, gather
everyone for a casual meet-up. During the meeting, ensure everyone gets a chance to speak, and
the environment remains non-confrontational.
7. **Set Ground Rules**: As a group, you might want to set some guidelines for group chat
behavior. Everyone should agree on these rules. They could include things like avoiding
personal attacks, using emojis to clarify tone, or taking personal issues to private chats.
8. **Give Benefit of the Doubt**: While it’s clear that the texts are causing hurt, remember that
text messages lack tone, facial expressions, and other non-verbal cues. It’s possible for messages
to come across more negatively than intended.
9. **Consider a Mediator**: If the issue persists, consider involving a neutral third party to
mediate the discussion. This could be a mutual friend or a professional.
10. **Re-evaluate the Group Chat**: If all efforts to rectify the situation fail, you might want to
reconsider the dynamics of the group chat. Perhaps it’s beneficial to have smaller group chats or
individual conversations instead.
Remember that everyone in the group values the friendships, which is why the issue is causing
concern. Approaching the situation with empathy, understanding, and a desire to resolve
misunderstandings will help maintain the integrity of the friend group.
COM 361 Advice Problems & Response Paper
Point value: 120 points total
Due: There are two due dates with this assignment listed below, but all assignments are due at 11:59pm via
Blackboard dropbox.
– Assignment 1: Wednesday 9/27/23 (Advice Problem) and Monday 10/23/23 (Advice Response)
Purpose:
When considering how to be a competent communicator in our significant relationships (whether romantic,
friendly, familial, in the workplace, etc.), one key skill an individual should have is the ability to make decisions
about how to respond, communicate, cope, or handle the interpersonal and relational issues and problems
effectively. Therefore, the purpose of this assignment (completed twice during the semester) is for you to
identify common interpersonal and relational issues or problems experienced by communicators, to evaluate
those issues, and to generate potential solutions (i.e., “advice”) that would help you respond to and cope with
similar situations in your lives. With the new addition of AI, we will be asking ChatGPT to solve our problems
and then you’ll be able to compare it to what we’ve learned in class – does AI help us or hurt us? With this
assignment, you will also have additional opportunities to apply course content and to use course content to
solve significant, real-life interpersonal and relational problems.
Instructions:
First, you will write a 1-2 paragraph description of an interpersonal or relational issue or problem much like
would be submitted to an advice column like “Dear Abby,” but the problems will be addressed, “Dear COM
361.” These problems can be experienced (in any role), observed, or heard from others (or media) and will be
submitted anonymously at the start of class on the two due dates. You will sign a sheet of paper to
demonstrate you submitted an interpersonal or relational problem on time. When writing these problems, you
should change names, locations, or any other identifying information when writing your problems.
Second, once I have reviewed the problems, 3-4 problems (either the most common problems or several
problems “morphed” together) will be selected. I will then put those 3-4 problems through ChatGPT to see what
advice AI gives us. The problems and the AI solutions will be distributed back to the class (via Blackboard).
You will then choose to provide an advice response to one of the selected problems. The goal of the paper is
give the writer advice about their problem and address what AI gets right or wrong about the advice based on
class content. You will have approximately three weeks to write your advice response once the final problems
are distributed to class. You should not discuss with classmates, the professor, or anyone outside of the class
if your problem (or, someone else’s problem) was selected for the assignment.
Format:
Each problem should be typed and submitted anonymously in class. The problem should be 1-2 paragraphs,
should include enough information for shared meaning, and should not include any identifying information (for
the student or others involved). For example, you will not write your name on the problem and you should
change names, locations, and other information to protect identities.
Each response will be due approximately three weeks after the final 3-4 problems (with AI response) are
distributed to the class. Here are the specific requirements:
o
You (this is an individual assignment) will turn in the final, professional version of the paper that should be
typed using Times New Roman, 12-point size, 1-inch margins, and double-spaced with no extra spaces
between paragraphs or around headers.
o
At the top of each paper, you will indicate which problem you have selected (the problems will be named
and numbered to make it easier for you to identity your selected problem) and you should include your
name. No other information is required at the top of your paper.
o
The paper will be submitted on Blackboard by 11:59pm via the appropriate dropbox
o
Internal class sources (i.e., textbook, notes, handouts, etc.) are required for this assignment. For example,
content should be the basis of your advice and, thus, content from class (e.g., concepts, theories, ideas,
etc.) should be named, defined, cited, and applied. External sources are allowed and should be cited.
Students may make more connections to class content and/or use more external sources than required. All
sources should be cited properly. External sources should be cited using APA or MLA formatting style (If
you are a COM major or minor, I suggest using APA as other classes will require this formatting). For
internal citing, I have created the format to follow and here are the examples:
▪
▪
o
Citing Textbook: (McCornack & Morrison, 2022, p. 53). Indicate direct quotes (if content is verbatim)!
Citing Class Notes: (Class Notes, Conversations, 10/4/17). Indicate direct quotes (if content is
verbatim)!
Each response paper will be 4-5 pages in length and should contain these components:
▪
Introduction (1 paragraph): An introductory paragraph that set ups your paper including gaining
attention, introducing question, and an explicit thesis and preview for the advice to be covered. Bold
your thesis.
▪
Problem Evaluation (2-3 paragraphs): This part of the paper should be dedicated to the summary of
restating the problem. This where you communicate what you determine the problem to be (what you
view as the problem in your own words) and situating it as an interpersonal communication issue. You
may also briefly summarize the advice AI provided for your selected problem.
▪
Advice Description (2-3 pages): The bulk of the paper should be focused on giving advice to the
individual based on course content (class notes and the class textbook) and showing if AI was right or
wrong. You may wish to brainstorm which class concepts, theories, and ideas would be relevant in
which to organize this section around. In addition, this component should include an explanation of why
this advice would help and, thus, students can use examples (personal, witnessed, or from the media)
to achieve shared meaning with the professor.
▪
Conclusion (1 paragraph): A paragraph concluding the paper with a review of advice discussed
(restatement of the thesis) and closure to the entire paper.
Note: The paper may be written in letter-format directed to the person who wrote the problem (i.e.,
“Dear Lonely in Michigan”), but the above components should be included.
o
To help with the overall flow of the paper, please include transitions between paragraphs, internal
previews/summaries, and signposts as well as spell check/grammar check the finished product.
Evaluation:
The COM 361 Advice papers will be evaluated on completeness, accuracy, clarity, and quality, including:
1. The paper includes all the appropriate components and the goal is achieved (completeness).
2. The paper provides sufficient and illustrative detail, support, explanation, and connection to the course
content (detailed).
3. The paper includes responsible and realistic (i.e., competent) advice, course concepts that are defined
and applied correctly including proper citations (accuracy).
4. The paper should provide enough information for shared meaning to exist between the student and
professor as well as the paper should be “readable” (clarity).
5. The paper submitted should be the final professional version and the requirements are met to a degree
that is exceptional (quality).
All COM 361 Problems and Advice Response papers are due on time.